humorprints and art
This site is dedicated to humor
. . .
in print, in art, the miracle cure, the balm of life, the essential quality of the human spirit.
. . .
Laughing really does Matter
and so does Ink!

Please enjoy your visit, and give us your feedback. How has humor played a role in your life?

One of our favorite collections:
We call this page
Illuminati Literati

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Solitaire Game


MCSE Training

Visit the
Anecdotal Corner

humorous stories

Have a good laugh, and click on feedback, if you have a story to share.


Don't Drink and Fly!!!

humor halloween

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Chills and Cheap Thrills At Your Service

Keep hot when it's cold and cool when it's hot.

funny photo

This advice may also apply to some soups.

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For humorous articles backed by reliable research, you'll want to visit these sites created by author, Marjorie Dorfman:

Choose your topic, click on the image and have fun!

computer humor
Dont Tech Me In
food humor
Eat, Drink and Really Be Merry

home humor
Home Is Where the Dirt Is

middle age humor
Middle Age and Other Mistakes

culture humor
Pop Goes the Culture

Animal and pets humor
What's New, Emu?

education humor
I Was Absent

Copyright © 2003-2018 by Marjorie Dorfman.
All rights reserved.
Bookmark us and come back for another laugh when you need it.

humor articles

Guess Who’s Not Coming To Dinner? A Harried Look at Holidays and Relatives
by Marjorie Dorfman

Do you believe it's almost that time of year again? Just when you thought you forgot about all that special tension and stress the holidays can bring, there they are, right smack in your face. Read on for one way to cope with them, albeit with a laugh or two in the process.

mistletoe for christmas
Mistletoe and Other Body Parts
by Marjorie Dorfman

What is the true story behind this mystifying and notorious little plant? Why is it associated with Christmas and kissing? Read on, if your inquiring mind dare to know.

New Years and A New Leaf . . . Good Grief!
by Marjorie Dorfman

Is it that annoying time of year again already? You know, that moment when you decide to never do this and always do that forever more. Well, stop right there and read on. It's time for a change, a revolution in resolutions and a few laughs as well!

Happy New Year: Chinese and Otherwise!
by Marjorie Dorfman

Do other cultures celebrate the new year differently or are we all more similar than we think? Read on and learn about some interesting holiday traditions, even if you don't feel like celebrating anything at all.

dogs in costume

Halloween: Ghosts, Goblins and Lore with Gore
by Marjorie Dorfman

What does Halloween have in common with ancient Druid celebrations? How did the pumpkin come to be a part of this very strange celebration? Read on for some information, if you dare.

pumpkin carvingHow (Not) to Carve a Pumpkin: Some Halloween Words To The Wise
by Marjorie Dorfman

It is said there is a right and a wrong way to carve a pumpkin. Tried and true methods have come down to us through the ages but innovative mistakes seem to crop up every year. Read on and learn what to avoid this time; that is, if you dare!

cupid's bow
St. Valentine’s Day: The True Story Behind the Love and Kisses, Chocolate and Otherwise
by Marjorie Dorfman

Why is mid February a time set aside to honor lovers? Why doesn't it happen in spring or summer when splendor can be had in the grass without overcoats? Read on for some answers, whether you believe in love or not.

See the Archive of all Festive Features
Prizewinninghumor quotesBits of Wit

There are two things that are important in politics. The first is money, and I can't remember what the second one is.
Mark Hanna, Ohio Republican, 1895

What we want is a story that starts with an eathquake and works its way up to a climax.
Sam Goldwyn

After eight thousand unsuccessful experiments on a nickel-iron storage battery:
Well, at least we know eight thousand things that won't work.
Thomas Alva Edison

I'm glad the old masters are all dead, and I only wish they had died sooner.
Mark Twain

He had the sort of face that, once seen, is never remembered.
Oscar Wilde

Bachelor: A man who comes to work each morning from a different direction.
Sholem Aleichem

I got all the schooling any actress needs, that is, I learned to write well enough to sign contracts.
Hermione Gingold

Long experience has taught me that in England nobody goes to the theatre unless he or she has bronchitis.
James Agate

He is so mean, he won't let his little baby have more than one measle at a time.
Eugene Field

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
Jackie Mason

and . . . some more new definitions:

Bred: One brought up with a good attitude towards grains.

Butt: A conditional rear-end.

Catastrophe: When a cat displays good grammar.

Lexpionage: The sleuthing of new words and phrases.

Check the archive of past Bits of Wit

Humorous News items   humor newsfrom around the World

Clinton, Michigan (Detroit Free Press)

Two dogs have got married in front of 70 guests in a £700 ceremony in the US.

Two-year-old Bobby married Gracie, who's three, in their hometown of Clinton Township, Michigan, reports the Detroit Free Press.

Susan Laurer, 79, the owner of the groom, gave Bobby away to Gracie's owners, neighbours Frank and Cyndi Parise.

She said: "Bobby loved Gracie at first sight. Now they play together, walk together and fight together."

Bobby wore a top hat, black tuxedo and red bowtie, while Gracie, her nails painted pink, sauntered down the aisle in a puffy white gown.

"We are gathered here today," said Pastor Joseph DeRose of Evangel Christian Church in Roseville, "to celebrate the joining of the paws of Bobbie and Gracie on this beautiful Sunday."

After some brief remarks, DeRose announced: "Now I introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Bobby and Gracie Laurer."

During the reception that followed, the newlyweds dug into a two-tiered, bone-shaped cake with a pink heart in the centre.

Check the archive of past Humorous News items.

Eavesdroppings, or humor quotes   "Did you hear that?"

Questions put to a park ranger at Carlsbad Caverns National Park:
"How much of the cave is underground?"
"So what's in the unexplored part of the cave?"
"Does it ever rain in here?"
"So what is this . . . just a hole in the ground?"

And at the Everglades National Park, a ranger was asked:
"Are the baby alligators for sale?"
"Where are the rides?"

Check the archive of past Eavesdroppings.

humor headlineshumor headlines

Girlie Mags Must Stay Abreast of the Net

Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen in Years

Infertility Unlikely To Be Passed On

Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In Ten Years

Lack of Brains Hinders Research

Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed Needy

Check the archive of past headlines

For more laughs, check the Books and Videos page

Take a look at this great collection of refrigerator magnets!!

Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?
Now this is a puzzle, along with these other

And here's hilarious set of responses attributed to kids in 6th grade history.

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